June 02, 2006

From the middle school dean 06-02-06

The end of the school year brings with it the permission to exhale and plan time for renewal. This year, however, is different as I know that I will not return full of energy and with new ideas. With the recent hire of our new Middle School Dean I am all at once elated and saddened. The actuality is beginning to settle in. My tenure at PHS is coming to a close.

In recent days, on walks to move the car, in the stolen moments of reflection I visualize: myself on yard duty smiling at the sound of children laughing as they play; teachers during a professional development day making books to share with their students, all the while taking great pleasure in being allowed to play together; large pots of soup on a cold winter day, delighting in the fact that there is a vegetarian option; signing out one final time on what will be my last day at school.

As I begin to prepare for my departure many questions flood my mind. What will be my legacy? Years from now how will my students remember me? How will I measure my success? During moments of clarity I realize that these questions cannot be answered in my remaining time here. It may be weeks, months, and even years before I am able to bear witness to my impact on the institution and its student body and similarly, the impact of PHS on me.

For the time being I know that my attempts to remain present and tuned into all that surrounds me are becoming more and more difficult. During those times of challenge, I reflect on the following quote by Emerson:

To laugh often and much, to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children, to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends, to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others, to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch…to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded!

This grounds me, even if for a fleeting moment.

To the parents, students, and staff, I thank you all for allowing me the pleasure of being a member of the Presidio Hill community. I look forward to hearing and reading about PHS’ successes in years to come.

Main

May 26, 2006

From the multicultural dean 05-26-06

Priority

“Do we fear our enemies more than we love our children?” The bumper sticker caught my attention when I first saw it some years ago and it has camped on the back roads of my memory ever since. As our national checkbook pours billions into foiling potential terrorist threats while cutting funding for K-12 education, I think about how we at PHS are doing at loving our kids. Consider some of them…

Danielle (7th), who speaks French with a great accent and debates immigration reform with the intelligence of those much older than she; Charlotte (K) skipping as she delights in painting during free choice; Sophie D. (6th) comforting her classmate who’s grieving over a family loss; Francine (2nd), very much her own person; Dana (3rd) the smiling jump rope whiz; Gabriella (8th), who knows and loves Indian food; Pierce (1st) carefully separating the broken sand toys from those with some playing life left in them; Jacob (5th), both gentle and wise; Sergio’s (6th) amazing capacity for kindness and self-advocacy; Daija (1st) talking with her peers on the yard about how important it is for everyone to believe as they choose; Maia’s (4th) love of cooking; and the list goes on.

Our children bear in them what we would do well to appropriate. Speaking truth to power, they slice into our adult hypocrisies with the precision of gifted surgeons; in their minds, equity is a very real possibility. Though mercurial in mood, our children are steadfast in conviction that if the world is to be a more just place, we’d better take action and take it quickly. How clearly they see through facades, how articulately they name posturing and pretense. Children remind us of our humanity and lead us to rise above it and touch the face of the divine.

Will we love them enough to follow?

Lalitha Shastri

Multicultural Dean 

Main

May 12, 2006

From the middle school dean 05-12-06

The end of the school year is fast upon us. ERBs, the eighth grade trip, and graduation are only weeks away. As I pause to think about the final preparations needed to successfully close out the school year, I am overwhelmed at how much more there is to do and how little time left we have together. Grab a pen and date book or PDA…there are lots of things happening in the middle school and I wouldn’t want you to miss a beat!

Karen Amaker

Middle  School Dean 

Main

April 28, 2006

From the multicultural dean 04-28-06

Respect

“China and Its President Greeted by a Host of Indignities”.  The Washington Post’s April 21st article listed the various ways in which the White House insulted China’s President Hu Jintao during the dignitary’s visit to the United States. Some of the faux pas were unintentional (President Bush yanking President Hu’s jacket to steer him to the correct exit, for example), while others were allegedly intentional slights:  a luncheon instead of a formal dinner, refusing to fly China’s flag on the lampposts, and calling Hu’s visit “official” rather than a formal state visit.

Whether deliberate or accidental, the White House’s actions demonstrated a fundamental lack of respect for its guests, fueling the growing anti-American sentiment around the globe. As a political science professor noted recently, the U.S. has undeniable power that it doesn’t always use for good; flexing its economic and military muscles appears to be more important than modeling courtesy.

As a school that has been around for a long time, enjoying a reputation for kindness and compassion, PHS’s commitment to respect should be as natural as breathing. Students should easily be able to point to parents, staff and Board as examples of those who honor boundaries, display social know-how and hold each other accountable for interpersonal propriety. Yet, all too often we are as guilty as the White House of using our privilege in ways that demean others. What can we deduce from the liberties that some parents take with teachers’ property or instructions?  How do we come to terms with a Board member ignoring a staff member, refusing a simple “Hello” or eye contact? When students observe a pattern of condescension from one staff member to another, what explanations can we use as justification. Most importantly, how can we hold students to articulated standards for respect and responsibility when we adults often fall short?

When White House officials were confronted with the many insults leveled at China and President Hu, some insisted that we should “move on “ from what they called “momentary blips”.  But it is those very moments, the twinkling-of-an-eye opportunities to build up or tear down that can mark a relationship, whether between two super powers or two members of the PHS community. Acts of respect go a long way towards building a storehouse of trust and understanding. Let us invest wisely.

Lalitha Shastri

Multicultural Dean 

Main

April 21, 2006

From the middle school dean 04-21-06

As I began thinking about and preparing for my transition from PHS, I thought it best to spend some time with the middle schoolers to learn first hand about their middle school experience. This information would be useful for the new middle school dean as he or she navigated the murky waters that are the middle school social scene. What I learned was illuminating, as the dialogue shed light on the social dynamics in the middle school. It also gave me great pause and prompted the topic for this column—bullying.

PHS middle school students have reported being harassed and bullied by others in both divisions —lower and middle school. Addressing the issue with lower school students is straightforward and typically involves notifying the classroom teacher. After one meeting the parties involved, by and large, reach some sort of resolution.

Addressing issues of bullying with adolescents is a more involved and somewhat complicated issue. This is due in large part to an underestimation of its prevalence at school and the student’s reluctance to report incidences. However, based on recent conversations with students bullying is alive and thriving at PHS. Students have reported being targets of physical bullying (i.e., hit deliberately by balls on the yard, food thrown at them, being pushed against a locker), targets of verbal bullying (i.e., being called stupid, inappropriate comments of a sexual nature) and targets of non-verbal/non-physical bullying (i.e., given drawings of genitalia and other obscenities, exclusionary practices during group activities, use of internet and social networking sites). When asked why students had not shared this information with other adults or me, students replied that they never would have unless asked to do so. More disturbing is 1) an apparent lack of confidence in the school staff and administrators’ handling of incidents and reports and 2) retaliation by the bully(ies).  

In the 2002 American Medical Association report on youth bullying, Dr. Richard Gross wrote, “we are all bullies, bullied, or bystanders.” Bullying is defined as aggressive behavior that: (a) is intended to cause harm or distress, (b) occurs repeatedly over time, and (c) occurs in a relationship in which there is an imbalance of power or strength (2002 AMA Report). Table 1 highlights the most common forms of bullying.

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Report Summary:



Many who study the bullying phenomenon argue that policies such as zero tolerance, “three strikes”, and mediation are ineffective or, at best, temporary solutions. The school community is poised to address the issue of bullying by 1) educating parents and staff, 2) encouraging students to talk with their parents about their experiences at school, 3) developing effective, comprehensive bullying prevention and intervention programs, and 4) raising student awareness. As I prepare to exit the community, I want to shed some light on what our students are feeling and encourage them to continue the conversation with me and other teachers/administrators on campus. The advising program is a useful medium for addressing this issue, and I have full confidence that the incoming middle school dean will continue to build on our efforts to shed light on issues of bullying.

Ultimately, we are responsible for both educating our children and creating safe spaces in which they can develop into compassionate and just people.

Karen Amaker

Middle School Dean

Main

March 17, 2006

From the multicultural dean 03-17-06

Black. White

In a March 3rd article, the Christian Science Monitor calls it “the hottest button in the national psyche” and “the issue nobody wants to touch.” One hundred forty-four years after the Emancipation Proclamation and almost fifty years after the Civil Rights Act of 1960, race and race-related conversations continue to be a source of intense misunderstanding and discomfort.

What about PHS? How relaxed are we about looking honestly at our experiences, perceptions and bewilderments on race? As Multicultural Dean and as a woman of color, I’ve heard some people say that we talk about it too much, others assert that we don’t talk about it enough, and still others who are discouraged by talk that has resulted in little or no real, systemic growth. We love conversation yet seem to shy away from discussions that are potentially painful or polarizing, eventually preferring avoidance to wounds.

But there is a third and valuable option: authentic engagement as a bridge to unity. I offer you four ways to do this:

  1. Make whiteness visible. The bulk of policies, practices and chatter about multiculturalism in independent schools focus on people of color: hiring them, what their experiences are, how to empower them, etc. While I applaud these attempts and believe they should continue, I would like to see PHS discuss whiteness as an identity and what it means to be white, apart from “oppressor” or “colonizer.” For more on this subject, log on to http://www.uwm.edu/~gjay/Whiteness/Teachwhiteness.html
  2. Embrace conflict as an opportunity for growth. Conflict is natural and inevitable when people live or work in relation to each other, even in homogenous groups and especially between those that are different. Facing each other with transparent honesty may make us excruciatingly vulnerable but it can also help us understand each other more deeply. That understanding is vital to building a strong, trusting, resilient community.
  3. Separate political correctness from genuine kindness and compassion. Plato said that it is better to be openly unjust than to simply appear to be just. While appearances are important and political correctness is not intrinsically bad, it is no substitute for compassion emanating from a truly humane heart. A culture of “nice” can be an impediment to healthy evolution and does not necessarily promote racial equity.
  4. Practice honest introspection. One of the most difficult things in life is taking an honest look at the self, whether as an individual or an institution. We fear our demons, sometimes choosing to ignore them because casting them out could mean intense, long battles that we don’t feel equipped to win. But pretending they don’t exist only gives them negative power over us. Most importantly, courageous examinations of who we are can also lead us to discover the goodness within, perhaps the most effective foundation for building a just and equitable self. Being white doesn’t mean being racist, any more than being black means being a victim.

If you want to have constructive conversations on race, I recommend watching “Crash” the winner of the 2005 Oscar for best film, as a place to begin. If a long movie isn’t your cup of tea, consider “Black. White", a series on FX about two families—one black, one white—who swap skin color to experience living in each other’s shoes. It seems to be important enough for periodicals like the Christian Science Monitor to examine.  And it may lead us at PHS to the bridges we want to build.

Main

March 10, 2006

From the lower school dean 03-10-06

Family NightLast Thursday night we held our annual PHS Family Night and this years's focus was on activities that combined science and art. Approximately 100 people attended and participated in three different activities, and we had students ranging from kindergarten (and younger) to 8th grade. In one room we examined the characteristics and adaptations of fish and thought about their environments, creating our own unique fish to share with the group. We also explored the huge range of pigments available in natural items such as fruits, seeds, flower petals and more as we worked to create art from these Family Nightcommon items and then used a variety of leaves to make beautiful rubbings to show their structures. In the third room we explored color through a myriad of activities: making small color wheels that “combined” colors when they were set to spinning, mixing paints, graphing our favorite colors, and other hands-on explorations.

This is a fun event every year and it gives a rare opportunity for students and parents to work together on projects here at school. A big thanks goes out to Tanya, our third-grade teacher, for organizing the event, and to all the teachers who Family Nightplanned the variety of engaging activities and added an evening teaching load to their already busy day at the end of the week! Thanks also to all of the families who participated and helped to make this a warm and enjoyable experience.

If you did not attend this year, be sure to make a note to yourself to sign up for next year; it’s a really enjoyable way to spend the evening with your own family and the PHS community. And since you don’t spend the evening with students and parents only from your child’s own grade, it provides a somewhat different, broader view of PHS.

Main

March 03, 2006

From the middle school dean 03-03-06

Ivy Chen, an independently contracted health educator, has worked with Presidio Hill for a number of years and will return in a couple of weeks to meet with our sixth graders for a week of puberty education. Puberty education for 5th and 6th grade students will take place on Monday, March 20 – Friday, March 24.

The topics covered in the sixth grade curriculum include:
Ivy will host a parent education evening on Monday, March 13 at 6:00 p.m. for parents interested in learning more about the puberty education curriculum. To RSVP and request childcare, contact Brian at extension 100.

The high school admission process is coming to a close and families can expect to receive most admissions decisions on Friday, March 17. Please review the high school placement column in this letter for more information and some practical ideas on how to navigate the next phase of the admissions process.

Middle school closings: Classes are cancelled on Friday, March 17th (Faculty Work Day) and Friday, March 31 (Staff In-Service).

Parent Conferences are scheduled for Thursday, April 6, 1:30 – 6:00 p.m. and Friday, April 7, 9:00  – 4:00 p.m. Parents will receive a copy of the spring semester evaluations the week of March 27th. To register for a parent conference with your child’s advisor please use the conference binder located at the front desk. Please contact your child’s advisor for additional information.

Karen

Main

February 17, 2006

From the multicultural dean 02-17-06

Believing

The mere mention of “religion” stirs up in many people a plethora of feelings:  happiness, distaste, confusion, cynicism, hope, and ambivalence. Some even associate religion with many of the crimes against humanity, citing as evidence the Crusades begun in 1096 by Pope Urban II to “reclaim the Holy Land from barbarian Turks”*, the exclusion of women and gays from leadership in certain religions, and the use of allegedly sacred texts to justify the enslavement of Blacks.

As a non-religious school, PHS neither endorses nor repudiates the private spiritual practices of its community members. Rosh Hashanah, Lunar New Year, Easter, Diwali, Ramadan, Buddha Day and other religious holidays are listed on the more detailed, monthly school calendars and acknowledged as important to many of us.  We recognize that spirituality is one component of culture and that, whether religious or not, we all share a deep commitment to causes or principles on which we base our lives.

You will notice on the draft of the 2006–2007 calendar that Yom Kippur is scheduled as a school holiday. Since many of our families take that day off, we felt it would be most practical to close the school so that these students don’t miss any work and teachers don’t have to adjust or re-teach their planned lessons. Please note that we do not in any way want to communicate that we are honoring any one particular religion by this calendaring decision.

At a time in history when religious beliefs are being used for everything from denouncing a world leader after he suffered a stroke, to fervently defending the detonation of bombs in markets and restaurants, how can PHS serve as a builder of compassion’s bridges instead of hatred’s walls?  I encourage you and your family to talk and determine for yourselves just one thing you will do to promote peace and unity, both at school and in our nation. Then, share it with us so that we, too, can learn and act. May our beliefs stir up in our community bottomless pools of hope.

*www.medievalcrusades.com

Main

February 10, 2006

From the middle school dean 02-10-06

In recent weeks I’ve heard much about a new internet craze—social networking sites such as MySpace.com. It’s hard to imagine that anyone hasn’t heard about MySpace given the publicity it has received through word of mouth and in spotlights on major television news programs. MySpace is part diary, part photo album, part address book and quite a bit more, depending on how the member chooses to make use of it. Among the forty million users who log on to create, update, or read profiles, adolescents are by far the largest number.

Setting up separate accounts for email and instant messaging are a thing of the past. With advances in technology our students, along with Internet users around the globe, are now logging onto MySpace—the all-in-one social networking site. Logging onto MySpace requires all users to include an email address and other personally identifiable information (photos, school name and address, work address, relationship status, age, sexual orientation, online journals, etc). All of that information is accessible to anyone who creates a profile. MySpace users can browse the entire network of members by entering specific search criteria—age, interests, or location—and contact anyone they choose, or forward such information to others. No permission is necessary to access this feature and it’s all FREE!
On a recent visit to the website I read the following, “You can disclose as much or as little information about yourself as you want. We will only show what you choose to share.” Seems harmless enough. That is until you begin to preview the profiles. Some are relatively ordinary and include zodiac signs, pictures of friends, song lists, and basic entries about adolescent life. I found others to be quite disturbing, as they included provocative and sometimes nude photos, profanity, and personal contact information. It appears that there is little or no oversight of MySpace and users are given much latitude to express themselve in any way that they like.

So, why bring this information to you? First, the information may prove useful as you attempt to monitor your child’s use of the Internet. Additionally, some PHS middle school students have profiles on MySpace and your child’s name or photo may appear on the website without his/her permission. Finally, I simply thought you’d like to know! I encourage you to log on, search the website, and decide for yourself what your next step will be. My hope is that parents will continue to monitor what their child puts online. As one reporter stated on a television program on the subject, “strangers are watching” and so should you.

I invite parents to join me to learn more about Internet safety and to participate in a dialogue about how to protect your children in the technology age. In conjunction with the Parents Association, the middle school will host Angela Neff, Director of Technology at St. Matthew’s Episcopal Day School and parent of Madeline Shalita (8), as she presents on the topic of Internet safety on Thursday, April 20 at 6:30 P.M. A student presentation for grades 6–8 is scheduled for the following day, Friday, April 21. I look forward to seeing you at the parent presentation on Thursday evening.

Main

January 13, 2006

From the middle school dean 01-13-06

Hello and Happy New Year,

The New Year has only just begun and yet we’re mid-way through the 2005-2006 school year. High school applications are in the hands of admissions committees; we’re gearing up for the hiring season, completing the calendar for the 2006-2007 year, and close to hiring a new school director. What an exciting time!

With full support of the middle school team, Trevor is off to a great start as the new 8th grade Humanities teacher. We are fortunate to have someone who knows the PHS community so well. His classes are engaging and the students are responding well to their new teacher. Trevor will continue to prepare the students for 9th grade English and history. I look forward to working closely with Trevor to ensure a successful transition into the role of teacher and advisor.

On January 20, the fall semester will come to a close. Parents can expect to receive semester grade reports on or before January 27. The eighth graders’ transcripts will be sent to high schools on January 23 and will include grades from the 7th grade and the first semester of the 8th grade as well as ERB scores. Beginning with the spring semester, the middle school will reshuffle the sections to provide students an opportunity to work with others in their grade. In the coming weeks, parents will receive notification of their child’s section placement. The middle school schedule will reflect the new sections. Spanish language classes have not been impacted by the reshuffling.

With new beginnings also come inevitable endings. As you may have read in Ann’s letter, I will resign my position as Middle School Dean at the end of the academic year. I am thankful for having had the opportunity to work with you and your children. In the coming weeks we will begin a thoughtful and deliberate search for the next middle school dean. Parents will be apprised as the search progresses. While my brief tenure at PHS has been challenging at times, it has also been quite rewarding. I will miss being a part of such a wonderful community, but most of all, I will miss the students who have inspired me in countless ways.

A special thank you to the PHS families for their thoughtfulness during the holiday season.

Karen Amaker
Middle School Dean

Main

From the lower school dean 01-13-06

Enjoy the 3-day weekend, and consider taking advantage of some of the wonderful celebrations taking place around the Bay Area in honor of Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. Most communities have something interesting going on this weekend, and in San Francisco there are events scheduled for every day this long weekend, most of which are designed specifically for families to enjoy together.

Find out all the details by going to www.norcalmlk.org. On this site you can find information about Saturday’s Annual Youth and Family Day at Yerba Buena Gardens. (If you go and you’ve never walked under and around the fountain at Yerba Buena Gardens and read the words of Dr. King on the walls, don’t miss out any longer—it’s a powerful experience.) Sunday brings services in Dr. King’s honor at Glide Memorial, and Monday is, of course, the Annual Federal Holiday with many events happening in and around the Civic Center area and elsewhere in the city

Although all students will have some opportunity to discuss the life and work of Dr. King here at school, experiencing a celebration in his honor with family and community, outside of PHS, deepens children’s understanding of the importance of the legacy of Dr. King.

Lisa Jeli
Lower school dean

Main

January 06, 2006

From the multicultural dean 1-06-06

Spirit

I have the immeasurable joy of being from India, where spirituality is not only behavior but also a state of being. With a mixture of amusement and sadness, my family and I used to watch Westerners flock to Hindu gurus and Buddhist temples yearning for “enlightenment”, even trying to buy it, instead of realizing that it was already within them if they’d just stop long enough to be still.

In Eastern traditions, faith isn’t based on good situations (“I believe because everything’s going well”) or personal suffering (“I believe because I need something to hold onto in these dark times”). While circumstances and feelings shift like sand, the human soul is anchored by its own timelessness, its unwavering “I am”.

PHS has experienced a lot of change in recent years, which can bewilder and even shake us at times. But we must rest in the knowledge that, come what may, our love--of our rich history, our inspiring mission and, above all, our kids--binds us together and is the very North Star our institutional soul needs to stay the course with grace and in complete peace.

As we face the exciting possibilities of 2006, let us look back with pride, look ahead with hope, look to each other for sustenance, and, above all, look within. For we are not human beings on a spiritual path but spiritual beings on a human path.

Main

December 02, 2005

From the middle school dean 12-02-05

It was certainly a pleasure seeing so many of you last week during parent-teacher conferences. The conference is one of the many ways we partner with you to ensure your student’s academic success. In the event that you were unable to schedule a conference, please contact your child’s advisor to arrange a time to meet.

With Follies only nine days away, the students are devoting many hours to rehearsing lines, scenes, and monologues, and to practicing choreography for the performance. As in years past, Follies rehearsal at the Palace of Fine Arts begins on Wednesday, December 7 and continues through December 9, the day of the performance. Students should arrive at the Palace between 8:30 a.m. and 9:00 a.m. and are to be picked up between 3:00 p.m. and 3:20 p.m. Please see the enclosed flier for more information. Parents are encouraged to contact Lisa S. with questions. As always, we strongly suggest carpooling. I look forward to seeing you on December 9—you’re guaranteed a most memorable experience.

Beginning December 12, students in grades seven and eight will meet with Ivy Chen, health educator, for a week of sex education. Ivy has worked with PHS for many years and returns in March to meet with fifth and sixth graders. Topics covered in Ivy’s workshops include puberty, healthy relationships, body image, peer and partner pressure, media influence, sexual decision-making, sexually transmitted infections, and birth control. Ivy tailors each presentation to student’s needs, and ensures that all materials are accurate and age-appropriate. Included in the Friday letter for seventh and eighth grade parents are Ivy’s workshop summary (topics covered) and information from the Sexuality Information and Education Council of the United States (SEICUS).

Attention eighth grade parents: The independent school application deadline is fast approaching—Tuesday, January 10, 2006. During the winter break, parents and students are encouraged to finalize Part I and II of the common application. Advisors will complete recommendations prior to leaving for break. Recommendations (English, math, counselor) will be forwarded to schools along with the student’s transcripts in early January. Recommendation forms from public and/or parochial schools (i.e. Gateway, Sacred Heart, etc.) should be given to Karen as soon as possible. You should provide a final list of schools to which your child is applying to Karen on or before January 3.

This is my final column of the fall semester. I will write to you again as we usher in the New Year with an electronic version of the Friday Letter beginning in January. Happy holidays!

Karen Amaker
Middle School Dean

Main

November 18, 2005

Systems 11-18-05

He is an activist who has spoken in forty-eight states and on 350 college campuses, including Harvard, Stanford and the law schools of Yale, Columbia and Vanderbilt. He was Associate Director of the Louisiana Coalition Against Racism and Nazism, “the largest of the many groups responsible for the political defeat of neo-Nazi, David Duke.” He writes for ZNet, a web service that publishes essays by progressives and radical activists. He is an anti-racist who trains leaders on dismantling systems of racial privilege.

His name is Tim Wise and he is white.

When men speak for women’s rights or straight people stand against heterosexism and homophobia, there is a power that we’re hard-pressed to ignore. As white anti-racists, people like Peggy McIntosh, Allan G. Johnson and Tim Wise offer perspectives and action plans for racial equity that whites may hear more openly than the voices of people of color.

As PHS considers student and parent affinity groups, there may be some fear—spoken and unspoken—that the endeavor will be divisive. While the fear may in some cases reflect racism, sexism, homophobia or other forms of prejudice, I suspect that it is usually based on the false assumption that not pointing out differences is unifying. Furthermore, objecting to affinity groups or discussions on multiculturalism could in itself be a form of unearned, unconscious privilege.

In case you’re wondering what I mean by privilege, let me have Tim Wise tell you:

“It’s the ability to presume that your reality is the reality; that your experiences…are universal, and not particular to your racial identity. It’s the ability to assume that you belong and that others will presume that, too; the ability to define reality for others, and expect that definition to stick (because you have the power to ensure that it becomes the dominant narrative). And it’s the ability to ignore all evidence to the contrary, claim that you yourself are the victim, and get everyone…to believe it.”

So, how do we talk about something that people are unwilling to talk about? In my role as Multicultural Dean, I work very hard to urge difficult conversations as a way of increasing our authenticity with each other and building stronger relationships based on love and truth, not sentiment and pretense. I cannot say I have succeeded or even come close to it. But I keep trying, all the while knowing that our kids will benefit from our taking a constructive look at ourselves, both as individuals and as a school culture.

Systems of privilege, both unearned and conferred, will continue as they have for centuries. Unless, of course, we have the courage to take a long, honest look at them and, having done that, to join forces to dismantle them and build something new, something equitable and something just.

Like Tim Wise, I think it’s possible.

Lalitha Shastri
Multicultural Dean

Main

November 11, 2005

From the lower school dean 11-11-05

Teachers’ jobs are often self-described as isolating. This might seem strange to those who don’t teach, especially since most teachers are literally surrounded by people all day. This sense of isolation comes partly from the fact a teacher is generally the only adult in the classroom and as such, usually completes various tasks and teaches many lessons without the input, feedback, or support of other educational professionals. This is one of the reasons why sharing our experiences within our own school is so important; teachers need to have the opportunity to communicate their ideas, concerns, questions, and experiences with other educators, so why not utilize our own in-house experts: the other excellent professionals we have right here at PHS.

Each classroom teacher and shared teacher has a scheduled time at a staff meeting during which he or she presents some aspects of his/her program to the rest of the faculty. We have been doing this type of sharing in a more structured way this school year with excellent results. In my job, I am fortunate to get to see what many of our teachers do day-to-day, and I am still impressed when I get to hear even more details and examples at these regular presentations.

This past week, our “3-4-5” team (Tanya, Erainya, and Christopher) shared two important pieces of their program. It was exciting to see how they’ve worked together to ensure compatibility between their individual programs, creating a carefully constructed plan for helping students build upon the skills learned in the previous grades. Their presentation focused on portfolios of student-selected work and the current events curriculum.

The portfolios consist of work samples that students choose in order to illustrate their development over time in the various curricular areas. The pieces they choose are a mixture of their best efforts, examples that show areas still needing work, and examples which show how they have improved. The expectations for responding to the selections are not exactly the same in third grade as in fourth or fifth, but appropriately, these expectations are increased steadily as they move up through the grades, allowing students to develop and practice the important skill of thoughtful self-reflection. The students and parents in these grades are fortunate that they will leave fifth grade with a portfolio of assorted work samples that clearly demonstrate the changes in learning and development over the course of three entire school years, from the beginning of third grade to the end of fifth.

The last portion of their presentation dealt with their coordinated efforts at teaching the students to understand and critically examine the current news of the world. They have carefully designed each grade-appropriate piece, starting with the basics of who, what, when, where, why, and how in the third grade. Tanya also supports their early development in this area by providing families with appropriate resources for finding news items that students at this level can comprehend and deal with.

When they move up to fourth grade, the expectations naturally grow; students are expected to respond more critically (and in well-written paragraphs) to the articles they select. To further support their overall social studies goals in fourth grade, Erainya asks students to select news items related specifically to the state of California.

In fifth grade, the social studies and history focus moves from the state of California to the entire United States and beyond. Christopher uses the current events assignments to deepen the students’ understanding of the geographical regions of the U.S. and, again, ups the ante in terms of critical evaluation and student “ownership” of their responses by providing a variety of choices (including an assortment of writing options, art pieces, and oral presentations) in how the students might respond to a particular news item.

As with past teacher presentations this fall, I was pleased to see the kind of thoughtful work and cooperation that went into carefully designing the curriculum together; our students benefit greatly from this kind of intelligent and careful planning, and our faculty members enrich their own understanding of teaching by having this time to share with each other in this way.


Lisa Jeli
Lower School Dean & Librarian

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November 04, 2005

From the middle school dean 11-04-05

In my years at PHS I have watched, reflected, and talked with students. I have reviewed the curriculum and looked specifically at the human development program; I have taught the Self and Community courses to sixth, seventh, and eighth graders. I am impressed that PHS has committed to supporting students with such an engaging co-curricular program. With the goal of meeting students where they are and addressing specific developmental needs, I have redesigned the Self and Community program to some extent.

The sixth grade Self and Community course promotes and enhances the student’s ability to enter into and successfully manage early adolescence. As adolescents move toward independence they begin to struggle with their sense of identity. Through a thoughtful and critical exploration of the “whole” self, students consistently reflect upon several essential questions guiding the course:

Through class discussions, student projects, debates, role-playing and group cooperative activities, students begin to effectively answer the question, “Who Am I?”

In eighth grade, students are supported throughout the high school application process in a weekly seminar during their fall semester. The Counseling Students for High School course provides a structured and supportive environment for students to discuss their plans and feelings related to high school. This Self and Community course offers students weekly counseling, one-on-one and large group meetings, and guest speakers from area high schools to support them through this somewhat overwhelming process. By the end of the semester students will have acquired the knowledge and skills to transition successfully from middle to high school.

Because each adolescent is an individual with a unique personality and special interests, likes and dislikes, and because they continue to reinvent themselves, I continue to watch, reflect, and talk with students. I invite you to do the same!

Karen Amaker
Middle School Dean

P.S. Lalitha Shastri, Multicultural Dean, teaches the seventh grade Self and Community course, which focuses on hunger and homelessness.

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October 21, 2005

Fact in Fiction

“It’s less about plot than power.” So said a National Public Radio commentator on the work of absurdist playwright Harold Pinter, winner of the 2005 Nobel Prize for Literature. Using seemingly innocuous venues and events—a room, a birthday party, a homecoming—Pinter “allows us to eavesdrop on the play of domination and submission hidden in the most mundane of conversations.”

It is in the casual, ordinary discussions over coffee or at soccer games that we hear what people really think about PHS’s articulated commitment to multiculturalism and inclusion. More planned, deliberate avenues can be too uncomfortable, the potential for conflict inordinately high. Yet, if we shy away from the possibility of painful truths, do we not also deprive ourselves of potentially hopeful ones? “Nice” is rarely a worthwhile substitute for authentic inquiry. The community that cushions itself against grief also cheats itself of joy, since the path to healing always runs through brokenness.

So, my challenge to you, the parents, staff, students, and Board of this school that I’ve come to love so much, is to push through the discomfort. Don’t run. Don’t pretend. Risk. Stand with me and let’s talk. Let’s honestly examine who we are and keep pressing towards who we not only want to be but who we know we can actually become. Let the ideal—a culture of empowerment and safety for everyone—make us ravenous for achieving it.

Somewhere along the way, perhaps someone will write a Pinteresque play about PHS. I wonder … how would art imitate life?

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October 07, 2005

From the middle school dean 10-7-05

With just five weeks into the school year the middle school is all abuzz—students are working on completing their first big project of the year, field trips are planned, and the high school admissions process is under way. Yet, how much of what we do on a day-to-day basis do students actually share with parents? Well, on Tuesday, October 18, parents will have an opportunity to return to middle school and learn first hand what students are learning during our Back to School Night. Parents should arrive to school (Susan Andrews Theater) on or before 6:30 p.m.; please be prompt, as ‘classes’ will begin at 6:45 p.m. Families are asked to RSVP to their child’s advisor by October 21.

In preparation for the class trip to the Four Corners, the eighth grade students and families have begun their fundraising efforts. The next fundraiser is the Garage Sale, which is scheduled for Saturday, October 22 and Sunday, October 23. Please continue your support of the students by attending and purchasing items for your personal use as well as delicious baked goods. For more information about the garage and bake sale, contact Laura Shine-Revilock.

On November 2 the seventh grade, with chaperones Jennifer Franklin (Humanities), Wendy Furry (Math) and Sue Marvit (Science), will depart San Francisco for the Yosemite Institute. Students will travel by Amtrak to Yosemite Institute’s Curry Village and will reside in heated-tent cabins for two nights. In a recent meeting with the excited seventh graders, Sue discussed planning and preparation and distributed a permission form, packing list, and other pertinent information. Please return the permission forms and other documents to Sue as soon as possible. Parents will receive an updated information packet by October 18. Sue, the principal organizer of the residential field science program, will remain the primary contact person for the trip. However, please do not hesitate to contact me with questions.

I am pleased that so many of you were able to attend the Fall Gathering. It is always a pleasure spending time with families outside of the regular school day. A reminder... school is closed on Monday, October 10 (Fall Holiday), Thursday, October 13 (Staff In-Service) and Middle School classes are not in session on Friday, November 4 (MS Faculty Work Day). I look forward to seeing you at Back to School Night and at the Halloween Parade later this month!

Karen Amaker
Middle School Dean

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September 23, 2005

Belonging 9-23-05

Over the past few weeks, the U.S. and the world have watched suffering in startling images, this time at our own doorsteps instead of thousands of miles away in Asia or Africa. The havoc that nature wreaked didn’t break our hearts half as much as the unwillingness of city, state and federal officials to respond promptly to the predominantly Black and poor citizens of the Gulf Coast.

The healing offered to the victims of Katrina has come from ordinary people, some as poor as those affected, who’ve given shelter and sustenance. But the most important gift has been belonging. Families all over the country have taken evacuees into their homes, hugged them, wept with them, and said, “Here, you’re safe.”

In my last Friday letter, I promised to tell you what the “first aid kit” of equity and justice might contain. And I think belonging is an essential balm. Here at PHS, belonging happens in so many ways: staff reaching out to one another in times of illness or sorrow and easing the burden; a middle school student hugging a kindergartner; a parent stopping to give a teacher a ride from the bus stop; kids stroking our dog friends Migas and Tahoe as if to say, “You’re one of us, too.”

One of the most normal and essential forms of belonging is the gathering together of our students of color on the yard or at lunch. Members of emerging groups—people of color, those who are LGBT, people with learning differences, etc.—who co-exist with members of dominant groups, need and want a place of connection and safety where they don’t have to explain themselves or fight stereotypes and discrimination. Respected universities like Pepperdine, Brown and MIT have long recognized the need and provided opportunities for students and alumni to join affinity groups based on various aspects of identity. Belonging can have profoundly positive effects on academic performance, emotional health and social contributions.

In an effort to support our students, we are offering middle school students the opportunity to form and belong to affinity groups. Students of color, those whose parents are gay or lesbian, and students with learning differences are just some of the groups being considered. The purpose of the groups is twofold: to provide a place of belonging and to educate others. Membership is strictly voluntary; each group will have at least one staff sponsor, with the Multicultural Dean providing oversight for the whole initiative.

We will all need to be educated on the “why” and “who” of affinity groups. Beverly Daniel Tatum’s Why Are All the Black Kids Sitting Together in the Cafeteria? is a good place to start. If you’d like to borrow a copy from the PHS library, please e-mail Lisa Jeli

I, for one, am glad I belong to PHS. Our history reflects a rich commitment to helping the marginalized and disenfranchised find a soft place to land. And our students carry in them an active passion to reach out, to care, to say, “Come in. Be safe.”

Lalitha Shastri
Multicultural Dean

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September 16, 2005

From the middle school dean 9-16-05

Attendance, scheduling, discipline … all are components of my job as Middle School Dean. While I agree that they are both necessary and important, I must admit that the most enjoyable part of my day is the informal time spent with students. During this week, our first full week of school, I found myself spending many hours with students in both formal and informal settings.

As the sixth and eighth grade Self and Community teacher, I meet with students weekly to discuss issues of identity and high school placement. The sixth grade course focuses on identity development and is partnered with the sixth grade advising program. Eighth grade Self and Community focuses on the high school admissions process. Students are provided the opportunity to meet admissions representatives and, more importantly, have ongoing support throughout the process. The more informal time spent with students in grades three through eight typically takes place during lunch duty. This yard duty, which never feels like a ‘duty’, is really an opportunity to for me to connect with students and to participate in dialogue about topics of interest to them. The conversation happens organically and the students seem to be as excited to learn things about me as I am to learn more about them.

On Monday I ate lunch with third, fourth and fifth grade girls. We talked about our varying nutritional needs; some of us are vegetarian while others enjoy the taste of red meat and poultry. Some of us talked about our relationship with our siblings; one new fifth grader, Anna, commented that she missed her twin brother. This is the first time that they’re attending different schools. I learned that Anna’s brother is a ‘great kid’ (her words) and that she likes her new classmates. Other topics of conversation included horseback riding, summer camp, and the excitement of being in fifth grade. During my sixth grade lunch duty I found myself in a large circle being quizzed about my age (guesses ranged from 25–40), sharing information, learning about grandparents, and listening to critiques of mom’s cooking. Through it all-all twenty-five minutes-we shared laughter, and I felt a special connection with the students for whom I bear so much responsibility.

Building rapport with students is an absolute must and critical to my role in the middle school. If I am to be an advocate, confidant, and supporter, I must gain both the respect and trust of my students. Doing this takes time, effort, and an understanding of adolescent development. As I continue to learn more about students and the variety of issues they’re confronted with, I invite you to share in the discussion with me. On Tuesday, September 20, Anne Krantz will host a discussion on adolescent development and eating disorders. This middle school parent education activities will immediately follow the Corporation Meeting, 6:30 p.m.–8:30 p.m. I look forward to seeing you there.

Karen Amaker
Middle School Dean

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September 09, 2005

From the lower school dean 9-09-05

As interim lower school dean and librarian I’ve been privileged to introduce kids to our library and to sit in on a few classes these past several days. I had the pleasure of sitting on the carpet in one of the kindergarten rooms on Tuesday, a tired little boy’s head on my lap, singing along with the small voices (nearly inaudible at times) of our newest students while Dan strummed his guitar and tried to elicit a bit more volume from the kids. Later on, getting enough volume probably won’t be too much of a problem, but for now it’s their more timid and unsure voices we hear. It will be wonderful to see their confidence and their voices grow week by week.

I spent time with the new fourth grade class as they listened intently to a visitor from the Institute on Aging talk about their upcoming service learning project. They were finding out that some of the people with whom they’ll be working might not hear so well, may be partially blind or missing part of a leg, or could have great difficulty remembering them from one visit to the next. They paid close attention and asked thoughtful questions, such as “What should we say if they don’t remember us?” They were relieved to find out that it would be okay to simply introduce yourself again, as if it were the first time. I know the elderly people they’ll be partnered with throughout this year are in for a treat.

I’ve enjoyed my daily wanderings down into the theater during after-school, soaking up the relaxed and playful atmosphere, pleased to see familiar faces and the new young students joining this program. After-school time is so valuable for so many of our students. Since my son also participates, I get to experience that part of our school’s day as well, and I’m grateful, although it can be hard for me to leave before 6:00 p.m. because he almost always wants to stay until the very end.

I also watched first graders negotiate the sharing of blocks and puppets and strategy and word games during choice time and listened to a few of them share their own good ideas for making first grade work well for everyone. On another visit, Kelly was helping them to elicit genuine reasons for writing as they prepare to begin regularly scheduled Writer’s Workshops. Second graders, who are well into the swing of things in their own room but who haven’t had library time yet this school year due to their Monday period, accost me periodically to say “We want to come to the library!” I look forward to seeing them on Monday, and I look forward to meeting the rest of our new families and seeing some familiar faces that I’ve missed over the summer. Please stop by the library when you get a chance.

Lisa Jeli
Interim Lower School Dean & Librarian

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September 02, 2005

From the lower school dean 9-02-05

Nicole-and-classHere we go! We have a large and fabulous kindergarten group, fresh and eager faces in our other lower school grades, a terrific new kindergarten teacher, Nicole Toliver, and a great new third grade classroom on the second floor. My job has also expanded in exciting and challenging ways. Although my home base is still the library, I can be found peeking my head into lower school classrooms much more this fall, now that I am also working as the Interim Lower School Dean. I look forward to working in partnership with lower school teachers and parents in this important job while also maintaining our lovely library.

One thing the lower school staff has decided to do, which represents a small change, is to keep track more thoroughly of tardiness and attendance for their students. The results of this new and improved record keeping will be that your child’s attendance will be included in his or her written evaluation. We believe it will be helpful for families to see the cumulative report of their child’s attendance.

Here is how it will work: when lower school students arrive on time, teachers will take attendance and mark students either “here on time” or “not here”. That attendance sheet is sent down to the receptionist. Unless prior communication has occurred between parent and teacher, the receptionist (usually Brian, sometimes Martin) will call home to inquire about any missing child. We hope that you will find this comforting; it’s a way to make sure kids are where they need to be and everyone’s okay. If a student arrives late, they can let the receptionist know and then head on up to class. If you know you are going to be late in bringing your child to school, please call and leave a message at reception or on your child’s teacher’s extension. This will help us to avoid making unnecessary phone calls home.

Teachers will also be keeping their own detailed records in class, so if your child arrives at 9:30 a.m., or leaves at 2:00 p.m., those specific times will be noted. Teachers work very hard to plan each school day carefully, and it is important that students avoid missing class time unless they really have to.

We know it isn’t easy to get to school on time every morning, but we all need to make our best effort. (I definitely include myself in this!) My sympathies go out to those of you busy parents who are switching to the earlier (seems much earlier) 8:25 a.m. start time for fourth and fifth grades. Hang in there! For you, 9:00 a.m. now probably seems somewhat luxurious.

I look forward to getting to know you and sharing stories of our children’s challenges and successes. Please drop by the library and say hi when you have a moment, and don’t hesitate to contact me if you have any questions or concerns.

Lisa Jeli
Interim Lower School Dean & PHS Librarian

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From the middle school dean 9-02-05

While the summer offered us time to plan and accomplish our summer goals, many of us found it too quiet. So, on Wednesday, when seventy-six middle schoolers filed into the building offering hugs, smiles, and laughter as they greeted each other and their teachers, I was overjoyed. Thursday’s diversity dialogue with Lalitha offered students an entire day to discuss issues of identity (gender, culture, and race). Today, we were back to our regular schedule including the traditional park lunch at JK Park. I have to admit that I’m glad the school year has begun.

Our first parent meeting of the 2005–2006 school year is New Parent Orientation, which is scheduled for Tuesday, September 13, 6:00 p.m.–7:30 p.m. This evening program is designed to orient all parents new to the school or parents new to the middle school (who may or may not be new to PHS). The first half of the meeting provides information from which all new families will benefit, and the second half is middle school specific. Please contact me if you are unsure of whether or not to attend.

The summer mailing provided you with a middle school calendar highlighting many of the important dates for the year, including dates for class trips. Due to double booking, the seventh grade trip to Yosemite Institute, originally scheduled for October, has been rescheduled for November 2–4. Additional information about the trip, chaperones, and program details will be sent in a future Friday Letter. In the meantime, please mark your calendars with the new date.

Students are now required to sign in when they arrive at school and to sign out if they leave prior to the regular dismissal time. Parents should contact Brian or Martin at extension 100 before 8:00 a.m. to report absences or late arrivals. A call will be made to the parent’s home or work phone for all students who have not signed in and for whom we do not have a message from home.

By the way, on Wednesday we had perfect attendance in every grade in the middle school-what a wonderful way to start the year!

Karen Amaker
Middle School Dean

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Tool or Weapon? 9-02-05

I’m not good with a hammer. Whether trying to pound an unsuspecting nail into a living room wall or pulling one out of a wobbly bookshelf, the innocent hammer becomes more of a weapon than a tool, sending everyone within twelve inches of me sprinting to safety! Imagine putting a nail gun in my hands ....

All too often, so-called “diversity dialogue” can bludgeon more than it builds. Almost every time I ask why so many parents and staff seem resistant to even talking about gender, sexual orientation, race, and other dimensions of identity, I get a single response: it’s because of the pain that resulted from past discussions. Diversity “done” irresponsibly. Hurt people, fractured relationships. What may have been designed as a tool, quickly turned into a weapon. And silence or avoidance has become preferable to anguish.

But are wounds or pretense our only options? Surely if we never risk we also never progress. Can the door to sorrow lead also to authentic healing? During the August staff meetings, PHS teachers and administrators explored this question. With understandable trepidation and commendable courage, people expressed some of their fear, pain, even anger about how they experience race, whether their own or someone else’s. A beginning, perhaps, but a solid one, commencing what we all hope will be our common foundation for unity.

Our work together as adults always serves as a model for students. They watch, they see through our hypocrisy, and they challenge it. Guts and transparency, not fear and posturing, must be our hallmarks if we are to prepare our students for their sacred role as global citizens.

Building a home for equity and justice can result in more than a few bruises. That’s why we must work together. Like me, you may be awkward with a hammer. So why don’t we carry the first aid kit instead?

(In my next Friday letter, I will share what that “first aid kit” might contain.)

Lalitha Shastri
Multicultural Dean

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June 03, 2005

Good Intentions, Bad Impact 6-03-05

I just ordered a book called Breaking the Code of Good Intentions, which examines the way some people dismiss or diminish the negative experiences of others by pointing to well-intentioned actions. The author claims that “We meant well” can all too easily be a way of avoiding accountability for causing harm. The protest of good intentions ignores bad outcomes.

The San Francisco 49ers are currently downplaying the effects of their indefensible “diversity training” video that was sent anonymously to the media and broadcast on local and national television last evening. Coach and players alike are vehement about it all being done in fun and not intended to offend or hurt anyone. But hurt and offense are what members of the Chinese American and the gay communities are feeling. Racism and homophobia are no laughing matters for those on the receiving end. Good intentions do not cancel out bad outcomes.

In its most recent report on human rights abuses around the world, Amnesty International accuses the U.S. of violating the rights of prisoners held at Guantanamo Bay in Cuba. The international scandal of U.S. military personnel abusing detainees at Iraq’s Abu Ghraib prison and, most recently, Baghram prison in Afghanistan provide data to support A.I.’s disturbing claims. However, the Pentagon calls the report “ludicrous” and U.S. military leaders say that the deaths of prisoners during interrogations are regrettable but unintentional. I wonder what an Iraqi mother thinks about “unintentional” when she asks herself why her son stopped at that intersection the day he was arrested.

My hope for PHS is that “I didn’t intend to hurt you” will always be followed by “But I know you’re hurt and I want to be part of the healing.” Good intentions, bad impact, greater unity.

Wishing you a summer of peace and justice,

Lalitha Shastri
Multicutural Dean

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Commencement 6-03-05

Commencement symbolizes a beginning, origination, or introduction not only for the students in eighth grade, but also for all PHS students. For those in kindergarten through fourth grades, it means a promotion to the next grade level and the opportunity to work with a new teacher. In fifth grade, commencement signals the beginning of middle school and the introduction of advising, study hall, and park lunch. For the graduates of 2005, the culmination of their academic experiences at Presidio Hill School is only surpassed by the start of high school.

At the commencement exercises in June 2004, I read a poem entitled “Anyway” by an unknown author. The poem resonated with many people in the audience and I have chosen to share it with you today, as it will not be included in the graduation program this year. I am hopeful that the poem will inspire you to be ‘authentically you’.

Anyway

People are unreasonable, illogical, and self-centered.
Love them anyway.
If you do good, people will accuse you of selfish ulterior motives.
Do good anyway.
If you find serenity and happiness, they may be jealous.
Be happy anyway.
The good you do today will be forgotten tomorrow.
Do good anyway.
Honesty and frankness make you vulnerable
Be frank and honest anyway.
People favor underdogs but will follow only top dogs.
Fight for some underdogs anyway.
People may need help, but may attack you if you help them.
Help people anyway.
What you spend your years building may be destroyed overnight.
Build away.
Give the world the best you have and it may never be enough.
Give the world the best you have anyway.


My wish for all PHS students is the courage to maintain connections with those in your class, your school, and the community at large. Do what makes you happy, always do your best, and even when faced with challenges, do what you have to do anyway!

Congratulations to every student on your promotion. A very special congratulations and best wishes to the Class of 2005. I wish for you a great summer and the joys of discovery!

Karen Amaker
Middle School Dean

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